Thursday, January 31, 2008

I'm a floosy..

or maybe I just have the flu... On Ben's BIRTHDAY. I was going to be super sober driver tonight for him and his friends to go to the flying saucer, but instead I'm at home watching my big fat greek wedding and contemplating if it's too early to take nyquil. I'm also wondering if having a sip of wine will make me sleep longer and more effectively. Yes. Not sure it's going to happen, but whatevs. I did make him some cupcakes and homemade icing. So I"m not a horrible wife.

I thought perhaps being sick would offer me a weight loss chance. Negative. I've now had 2 cupcakes and nachos for dinner. awesometown.

Anyway, I'm out for now... I have to get up tomorrow and finish cleaning because my parents get in town this weekend and we're having a party for Ben on Saturday. Busy busy bee. One bonus is that I don't hae a ton of cleaning to do because since I've been home I do laundry basically as soon as there is a load to be done, I clean the kitchen daily and sweep often. I'm a good house keeper.

Anyway, here's to hoping it's not really the flu, but more of a short term illness.

Wednesday, January 30, 2008

It looks cold outside, but I'm not sure.

So, I'm laying on the couch looking out the window thinking that it looks chilly out there. Who knows though... I'm still focusing on not leaving the house so that I don't buy things ;) It's working so far! Perhaps I'm also laying on the couch because I have the slightest of a headache from last night?? I wasn't going to go to the bar we go to every tues, because we're trying to save money and I order wine instead of cheap beer. SO, I pretended to be in college again and had some drinks before leaving the house... because I'm economical. Then I ordered the cheapest glass of wine when we got there (I left the house because I decided human interaction was more important than watching the new Law and Order SVU... no worries, it's Tivo-d.) Anywho...
I'm about to use the facilities and I put my glass on the counter and run into an older gentleman's arm who then requests to purchase me a drink... for which I go for a more expensive option of wine. Of course I said yes! I'm working on being economical and this fell into smart economics. However, this type of free drink comes with it's downfalls. I mean, I have to stand there and seem interested in whatever the guy is saying and continue to work in that I'm married (this was said multiple times) and that I have a Divinity degree. This typicall makes people run... or ask if I can be in a bar. So, a good 10 minutes were wasted on my politeness, so I guess money smarts come wtih their downfalls.
So at the height of being money conscious I also ended up intoxicated and devouring some tequitos (perhaps I also need to be a bit more weight conscious). This always seems a less pleasant idea the next morning. I had both drinking and tequito remorse. But when you're unemployed perhaps this is the way life goes? I mean, that's what I'm learning from day time tv commercials. All I need to do is become a medical assistant and all of my worries will be taken away. Who knew?

Tuesday, January 29, 2008

If I had a super power

It would be to get rid of student loans. I know, some may say theirs is to read minds, or fly, or be invisible, or eat cheese, but not me. Mine is student loans. If I could council a young person I'd tell them to go to a cheap ass college they got a scholarship to. I wish someone could have encouraged this more forcefully to me! I mean, who the hell goes to the most expensive school in Texas based only on scholarships for their first year? Oh... um, I did. It turns out that at 18 I wasn't so financially savvy.
Something else I'd tell said young person... get internships. Don't babysit and nanny your way through college and teach swimming lessons in the summer. This gets you no where later in life. So what if you hav eto work a lot in school and have fewer friends or party stories. you should work!

Everyone should work and go to cheap schools. They should wear the same clothes all the time even if it's tapered legg jeans and flannel vests.

Ok, maybe I"ve gone too far. Either way... you should definitely not work in humanities. I mean, that or you shouldn't have loans if you get a degree in psych, sociology, or an MDiv. These are the new rules. If we ministers didn't have loans our fashion would be way better. I promise.

Sunday, January 27, 2008

Teen dispair in an adult body.

So perhaps if I write in pink I will feel better? I'm not positive that this is the case. I thought perhaps my new pink phone would do the same; as if phone calls on a pinkalicious phone will make phone calls more exciting or come more frequently. Turns out... not so much.

So, I'm a 28 year old searching for a career and a "life path." I think most likely I am frowned upon by most because I'm supposed to "know" by now. I mean, what does a woman with a desire to own her own clothing boutique, be a teacher, be a minister, be a philanthropist do? Especially when her degrees don't do so much to give experience in many of those?

So I think I decided that I'm basically a teenager trapped in adults body and this is also causing blemishes and a desire for uggs.

I mean, things could be worse. It's jsut that I'm surrounded by all of these guys who just finished college and they have careers. They have goals and know what they want to do. Granted, they go to bars that are filled with underage drinkers and $1 drinks and they bought really big TV's instead of having a nice dinner, but they know where they're going. I, however, have my TV on a milk crate in our living room (now complete with matching furniture, not milk crate furniture, but actual furniture), a dog, a yard, a house, an amazing husband, (who, by the way, has always know what he wanted to do and is super sought after.)

We moved back to Texas after being in atlanta for 5 years... something I thought I wanted only to realize I'm having to be lonely and lost. I know people say things like "well now you can really find what you really want to do." Uh... yah... I have on effing clue what I really want to do other than buy a pink phone and write in pink font. Oh, that and ask myself "how can (blank) ever happen if I have no money and no friends? ... oh, and the fact that I've gained weight and my skinny jeans no longer fit." Then it's like hey, you have no job, why don't you work out? Uh... yah, I just don't feel like it. I've become quite adept at doing laundry and watching TLC though.
So here I sit, in fashionable sweat pants that would make Clinton and Stacey pround (except the fact that I'm wearing them with house shoes) and watching a depressing movie. I can't leave the house because when I do I inevitably buy something. It's like programmed into me.

Maybe I should go work out, but most likely I'll just say that I should and instead I'll eat a girl scout cookie.