Monday, October 6, 2008

Mythical Creatures.

So, I was reading my latest Health magazine yesterday. Sophia Bush, of One Tree Hill, is featured because she is apparently super healthy. Well, she counts herself, and the magazine apparently lets her count herself as "curvy" at a size 2. Apologies to all of you mythical people who are a size 2 (not sure I think this size exists in a natural environment), but you are not, nor will you ever be, curvy. You can be healthy and be a size 2. This can be "your size". You are just one of those teeny tiny people in the world--but you are not curvy. I guess what frustrates me is that we have these ideas of what is ideal and it's apparently "ideal" for everyone--even though it's not RIGHT for everyone (hint owning a house, 2.5 children, hetero relationships... how do you have 2.5 children anyway?) I'm all for living healthy--watching what you eat (I simply watch my frozen yogurt intake go up by the week), working out etc. I'm ALL for this, but I am also for a healthy body image, not a distorted one. I think it's hard for us to see ourselves the way others see us. I've been at the place where I need to lose weight, (yes other than 10th grade)... 1 year post marriage... I did not really noticed HOW MUCH weight I had gained. yikes. I see this more clearly when I look back at pictures. I definitely have an ideal size for myself that I believe to be healthy--even though when I am at that size, I still feel like I should lose weight. Can we ever be really happy with what we look like? Can people who make jeans realize that not everyone in the world is 5'10"? (thank you Joes for making a shorter length!)
One of my problems is when I need to lose weight--I occasionally lack the motivation to do anything about it--other than obsess about it in my mind and let those words fall out of my mouth. Then, all of a sudden I'm back on the band wagon and ready to cut my calories and stick to my 19 points. I'm wishy washy.
I've not been to the place where I need to gain weight... so I can't speak knowledgeably on this (I'll leave it to Sophia... kidding, I think she's adorable.)
I am concerned by our country. I'm concerned that we have tv shows where people have to go to lose weight. I am, oppositely, impressed with the amount of people every day who decide to make a healthy choice, a different choice, from what they would have made yesterday. It's hard to make the change and to start truly being healthy. How do we start? Where do we begin to find what is a "healthy weight" for each individual? I'm frustrated by the statments that if you are this height you should weigh this much. Um, when do you take into consideration muscle mass? (this coming from the girl who can't wear zip up boots because my calves are enormous. I hate them. hate hate hate.) Anywho....
This is all to say... there are women without curves, I long to be one, my husband longs for me to not be one. Where is the healthy medium? When will I stop eating emotionally and out of being bored? Probs never. In that case... I should probably keep running for life. At this point I'm eating whatever and whenever I'd like. One would think that a person training for a marathon should be super skinny--eh, this hasn't happened to me yet! I'll keep crossing my fingers and eating nachos, and praying for my legs to grow longer and skinnier.
And Sophia... go eat some cookies.

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