Austin got a new whole foods today. Well, they've been building it for like... ever. I forgot that it didn't open on Monday. They lured me in with free meat.
Post nap time I got the kids together and headed out. When I saw the 8 cops directing traffic (no lies) I should have left. Immediately. Then. Right then. When I didn't I should have left when I attempted to pull into a parking spot and jerk faces wouldn't slow down for me to do this. ASSHOLES.
Then, I should have turned around with my 3 year old and my baby wearing self when I entered the store and I began sweating because it was 300 degrees and people continued to be jerk faces because there was wine tasting. And the 80 million employees? Thanks for blocking the aisle.
I got my free meat. 2 apples. Pre chilled wine. (THANK GAWD.) 2 smoothies (after waiting for effing ever because the "group" in front of me didn't know what they wanted until 8 minutes in to talking to the people working there.) Because I PROMISED my 3 year old we would get a smoothie.
My 10 month old loved a smoothie and proceeded to lose his effing mind and ripping the straw out of my cup. There were no cart returns. Anywhere near my car. Meyer slow loud cried the whole way home while I continued to sweat from my pits.
Free meat and coupons is totally not worth it.
My buzz. My buzz is my saving grace.