Tuesday, June 17, 2014

Other moms.

I mostly keep to myself.  I talk to everyone, fo sho, but in the parenting gig thing I mostly just focus on my kids when we go places.  Also, I occasionally find other kids annoying.  Mine too.  Not saying they are perfect.  Anyway.... as you have seen G$ is in the swimming world.

The pool makes me massively anxious.  I watch him in swimming lessons because really, the 17 year old swim instructor can't watch everyone and three kids age 5, almost 4, and 3... is a lot to keep up with.  (along with the other classes going on.)  Today, G kept going off the step when it wasn't his turn.  Finally, one time at the end, he couldn't make it back up.

Mama saves.

He cries.

I hold him on the side of the pool.  Lessons are over and we are the only people sitting there.  Him crying.  Me holding him when another mom walks up.

She proceeds to tell me about how when she was growing up and in swimming lessons her mom went to get a snack and the swim instructor thought she had made it to the side, but she didn't and she fell to the bottom and panicked, and some lady grabbed her by her hair and saved her.  Otherwise she wouldn't be here.


Why, other moms?  Why?

Thursday, June 12, 2014

Single parenting isn't my favorite.

If you follow me on the insta's you know I've been single parenting.  A lot.  You know that I have two wild boys.  I'm preggo with the third.

I also like to complain.

This, Ben says, is MAYBE the last trip, other than the other last trip/in Austin work extravaganza until baby comes.  I believe it too.  Maybe.

Anyway, I have not been sick in approximately one year.  Until this weekend, when I contracted some sort of plague.  I'm probably dying.  Anyway.  G started swim lessons on Monday.  Oh, back it up.  I first woke up to Meyer Monday morning and brought him downstairs.  Began making him breakfast only to see that there is a MOUSE in a trap.  Ummm a MOUSE.  If you are counting wildlife in our house we have had bats, raccoons, and now mice.  I HAVE FOUND ALL OF THEM.  GROSSSSSS.  Living on a green belt is so overrated.

Swim lessons.  Plague.  Single parenting.  Day 2.  Meyer woke up at 5:45.  Screaming.  For no reason.  He also pooped in the bathtub.  I took him out and put him on the potty.  Nothing.  Then I got him down... and he proceeded to poop on the floor.  twice.  and walk in it.  AMAZING.

Day 2 down.  How many more to go?

Pardon the mom shrieks. Swimming lessons

Last year swimming lessons were mostly failure.  G had fallen in the pool the weekend before he started.  It had been raining.  The water was cold.  He had a newborn brother.

This year... different story.  First of all, he truly believes he knows how to swim because he had lessons last year?  Ummmm ok.  So we've been trucking it to the pool this week.  We go early.  Take dinner.  Have lessons.  Continue to talk about how he knows how to swim.  He wants to go off the diving board.  He wants to go down the big slide.  He wants to swim underwater.  He is rocking it.

We hadn't tried the diving board until tonight.  The first attempt was a little intimidating.

Then he brought his A-game.  I hope you can see his pride in his face.  But you probably can't over my shrieks.  I'm one proud mama.

Friday, June 6, 2014

Life Lessons.

We went to the pool for the first time this season on Saturday.

This was after a long effing day of buying a car with 2 children (never again.... which is good, because I will get a new car in like 20 years or something.)  Long.  We even only went for one specific car.  They finally let us go eat lunch while waiting and the closest thing was a Wendy's.  G said... ew gross to the nuggets I got for him and Meyer.  Meyer refused.  They both refused the frosty.  What?  I guess that's what happens when they only get chic fil a.  yummmmmmmmmmmmmmmm.  side tracked.

Anyway, there is only so much to do in a car dealership with two small people and it is 100 million degrees outside.  They behaved as best as they could.  So the pool was a reward for my non napping kids.

We geared up.  I threatened G to get it together.  We made it to the pool with 800 of our closest neighborhood friends.  G was over the MOOON.  He also lives in some fantasy world that because he took swimming lessons last year (in which he refused to participate 95% of the time) that he knows how to swim.  Anyway chillin in the kiddie pool jumping up and down, going down the slide.  Then joins me and Meyer in the big pool and ingests a shiz ton of water because he can't swim with his mouth closed.  Keeps coughing.  I keep saying that if he keeps swallowing water he will throw up.  "No I won't mommy.  I'm not swallowing water."

Cut to 10 mins later and he vomits in the kiddie pool.  I remove him as quickly as possible.  Tears.  He is in tears.  Not because he "frowed up" but because we are leaving.

With this comes his life lesson, "Griffin, any time you throw up on yourself it's best to go home and take a bath."

And this my friends is kicking off pool season 2014.  To chlorine!  And your kids not eating that day so only having apple sauce vom!

...it could have been worse.