Tuesday, May 6, 2008

Indecision '08

SO, how do I go from having a loathing for my working career (though I really do like the guy I'm working for, it's just not at all fulfilling), to having 2 great job offers? I mean, seriously? What the hell? or the h-e-double hockey sticks considering my near work with children again. I'm having this terrible time trying to decide what to do.
I THINK I've decided that I'm definitely going to work at the school, now the choice is do I also work at the church? Both of these jobs are part time and both are awesome opportunities, but do I want to work on weekends? If we end up going to that church and I volunteer that would suck not not get paid for what i"m doing. It's a great church that's open and affirming to all people and I love that. I just already have 6 weddings between now and november and that's a lot of Sundays away. I mean, what if Ben and I want to go somewhere for a weekend? Stress stress stress...but at least my stress is well dressed. The moms came in town while Ben was in the UK and we did the usual of shopping and pedicuring and margaritaing. All delightful events. Then my wonderful husband also bought me some lovely articles of clothing from a far away place.
Ok, back to the issue at hand... so I haven't been sleeping and it's all I can think about. Everyone is like, well at least it's a good decision... blech. right. Luckily the doc gave me some ambien yesterday and I freaking love that shiz. I sleep not well in general, but with all this crap on my mind I can't turn off myb rain at night... not even after a couple of glasses of wine. So, I tried a half of a pill last night and I sleep SOUNDLY. The addictiveness, I believe, must come from the deep desire to be rested. I Can't wait to take it again tonight. This does not help the thoughts of me being a druggie. I'm not, I swear! It's my first time. I can quit anytime. So, I'm sending one up to the JC about this buisness and I'm "hoping to see only one setta prints." Seriously, if only I could be a conservie and "let go and let God" life would be easier, but alas... So, I would love all of your thoughts and prayers as I attempt at discerning my vocational options. Stupid grown up words.

I start mentoring with Team in Training next week! We had our first meeting on Sunday and I'm pretty excited to get back involved with that. I think it will be a great way to meet poeple. I'm not getting to do the Nike this year because Ben has a friend getting married that weekend (lame) so I'm doing one in San Antonio. IT's also a lot cheaper fundraising wise so that's a good idea I suppose. Also keep me in your thoughts as I have not really been running as much as I should... I hope I don't die, but that if I do become injured there's a medical professional close at hand... and if there's not... just take me to Target. I believe that this is where rehab should be for me due to whatever ailments.

Oh, and you may remember my april challenge to lose 5 lbs... well, I gained and lost the same ONE pound a couple of times. I'm going to transfer that goal to May. This seems more realistic

It's Mother's day this weekend. Perhaps I'll give my mom some ambien. I believe that Jesus lives in Ambien and this is how He's coming back. Lucky for me, I'm on the A-train.

2 comments:

JilliBean said...

i want some ambien. So i think you should shy from the church job. it seems like it is just going to cost you too much stress. Don't take it out of a feeling of obligation toward the church it has to be something you really want in order to sacrifice so much of your time. And that is hubby time. I know that that time is important.

Scott said...

are you still riding the a-train?