Thursday, January 17, 2013

A large jicama. Mature content.

That's what size babycenter says my baby is right now. 

Mature content.  Not safe for work.  Woman bares all.
Now go to the store and feel up some jicamas.  Find the largest one.  Now imagine that jicama with jazz hands and in a musical theater way, not in a Richard Simmons way.  There is totally a difference.  But the jicama will only do jazz hands when you forget about him and are going about your business trying to sit up at your desk.  And pizow, jazzy hands.  Only in my right ribs.  Simultaneously punching me in my bladder.  Actually, maybe I have a Michael Phelps in there with the wing span of a giant?  It's unclear.

Getting panicky about how unprepared we are for this kid.  Also panicky that he'll come like 8 weeks early.  Which would be now. 

Also starting to think we should mention the baby to Griffin more.  Maybe everytime I ask him if he needs to potty I'll also be like, "mama's having a baby"... so 3587x per day.  Overkill?


CDS said...

You look AMAZING!!!!!

Sarah K said...

Seriously, you look great! I'm that size past 6pm every night at 12+ weeks. Oops. Talk about 40 lb babies.

A.B. said...

Thanks friends. Flattery will get you everywhere with me.

To be honest. I LOVE being pregnant. A lot. Other than the shortness of breath and current massive back pain... I love the bump, love the movement, love the nesting. Also, terrified of the not sleeping post baby :)