Single parenting.

The D.B. took a man-cation this weekend.  His yearly trip to his families E.TX tree farm with his men.  They do manly things—aka, drink beer and whiskey, drive recklessly in 4 wheel drive vehicles, fish, drink beer and whiskey, cook, shower less often than they need to, and drink whiskey and beer.  No specific order…except the whiskey and beer are intermixed into all of those activities.  I think they also work in screw-mosas (mimosas in which you also include a little bit of vodka.)  Pour one out for your knocked up homies, my friends.  Don’t really pour it out though, because that’s wasteful. 

So me and G$ had a mama/son weekend extravaganza.  We made pizza together (he is very intent on “helping” me cook.)  He ate mozzarella cheese and basil.  No pizza.  I ate my entire pizza.  Good job, mama. 

I want dat cheese in my mouth.

He SLEPT UNTIL 7:10 on Saturday morning without fussing when he went to bed on Friday.  Hellsyeahallujah.  We didn’t have many melt downs.  He did force me to chase him down the street while he rode manically fast on his tricycle.  Hello 8 month pregnant lady jogging in flip flops for her crazy ass 2 year old.  Lets never do that again.  It involved tears and screaming on our way back to our house in which one of my neighbors stopped us to make sure G was ok (make sure that I was not mistreating him.)  ummm.. right.  Cue friend taking pity on me and inviting us to dinner and me shamelessly accepting. 

creepstar picture... clearly didn't know my settings were off

Did you know Ramen restaurants are the new thing?  I apparently had everything figured out my freshman year in college.  I’m a child before her time, obvi.

Saturday night he woke up in the middle of the night screaming he needed to potty (EFF ME potty training) and then he had to go “nigh nigh in mama’s bed… with all my things.” 

“All my things” =’s 2 blankets, bunny, 3 lambies.  He is all of a sudden attached to ALL of them, when it was just lambie.  What is up with that?  How do I phase him away?

Feed the ducks/eat bread

I thought, sure.. maybe we’ll sleep in.  AND the 2 of us in a king sized bed is probably pretty spacious.  Wrong.  Did you know that your child will STILL want to sleep on your pillow.  With you.  While touching.  Holding hands.  Kicking you in your baby maker.  Rolling.  Flopping.  Sitting up.  Hitting head on headboard.  Sleeping nose to nose.  Still pushing you to the edge of the bed?  Did you know that?  Said child will also wake up early.

I also let him watch a lot of tv on Sunday morning.  Parenting tiredness.  I closed my eyes during one show and G said, “Pwease wake up, mama.”  Ug… I’m trying fool. 

So we went to feed the ducks.  G went to eat bread.  We played on the play ground.  I had a lady stalk me about where G goes to daycare because he talks so well (read, non-stop), and because he can play on the jungle gym.  I wanted to tell her that her child could also play on the jungle gym if she’d let her, but I didn’t.  Then I let him take STRAWBERRIES FROM A STRANGER because it was awkward and I didn’t know what to do.  What do you say? 

Ready.  set.  go.

Honestly, it was a pretty fantastic weekend.  We miss dad and his swinging abilities (that sounds awkward, no?)  He gets home tonight sometime.  Pretty sure that will involve a place on the couch for me with my feet up and a glass of vino during bath time. 

dats a crazy slide.

Also will plague me with questions of can Meyer be this sweet?  Will I love him the way I love G$?  What WILL his gangsta name be?  And other sorts of life challenging questions.

mama, hold my hand.