Left behind?

It occurred to me on my way to purchase soup (before my 40 days of frugalness) that last night I may or may not have eaten a tortilla that had mold on it. SO, in the unfortunate event that I am quickly taken from this life and indeed NOT left behind (please contact kirk cameron if this happens)... here are some basic wishes.

1. I love a group dance scene. I would like for everyone to please coordinate this--possibly to Thriller (tryouts for female part beginning now), Britney, or Avril. I haven't yet decided.
2. There will be no open casket. This is creepy town. There may, however, be a lovely photo-shopped picture of me that contains one chin, bigger eyes, and amazing makeup--and no roots.
3. Open bar.
4. All airlines will deeply discount tickets for my friends. The only way others know how important you are is if there are a lot of people at your funeral.
5. It will be mentioned that while I was also a body double for Jennifer Anniston I was able to bring purified water to Africa and cure AIDS. I also visited and donated to many 3rd world countries.
6. My eloquent friends may speak on my behalf about my greatness--before they get sloppy. Please write these stories down and share them (feel free to leave out select memories.)
7. Everyone may sit around crying and laughing at my amazingness and trying to be more like me.
8. Your children may be named after me--and you can, in fact, change your current children's names to reflect mine.
10. I will be given honorary degrees from multiple institutions and probably mentioned in the next Presidential address.
11. Clinton Kelly will be my best friend.

I may add things... but this is a good start.